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A 5-Minute Practice for Growing in Self-Awareness and Gratitude
A quick daily reflection can be instrumental to helping your adolescent child to grow in self-awareness, self-love, and gratitude. Michael Nicholson, Ed.D., a private Catholic school principal, offers this simple guide.
Throughout the natural flow of the days, months, and years, we find ourselves faced with both good and bad. There’s the blessings, the joy, and our gratitude for them. And then there’s the disappointments and our awareness of the very temporal nature of the world around us. However, each new day provides the opportunity for us to hit the pause button and to take stock of our lives and our relationships. This activity is equally beneficial for adults and young adults alike. But how do we do this?
Here’s a simple but effective exercise that I encourage you to share with your child. While this practice finds its roots in Catholic, Ignatian spirituality, it is timeless and widely utilized. It’s called the daily examen, and there are myriad interpretations available for your practice. What follows is a basic version your child can utilize as a structured way to reflect at the end of every day, to refocus himself with gratitude and with hope for tomorrow.
Daily Examen:
- Begin with a calling of awareness to the present moment. This can be as simple as taking a few deep breaths and closing your eyes, or inviting God into your reflection.
- Offer gratitude. This is the time to look back on your day and remember all of the moments in which you experienced joy, love, peace, harmony, and happiness, as well as the moments when you brought those feelings to other people.
- Face your shortcomings. Look back at your day and reflect on the times where you were not your best self. It could be a moment of anger, jealousy, impatience, or perhaps a missed opportunity. As you call these moments to mind, it’s important not to be hard on yourself for what you’ve done or failed to do. Instead, distance yourself as if you were observing someone else’s behavior and be kind to that person.
- Look toward the day to come. Reflect on both the good of the current day as well as the opportunities for growth, and ask yourself how you can bring what you’ve learned into the coming day.
The beauty of this practice is that it only takes a few minutes and it can be done amidst the hectic flow and busyness of everyday life. It could be in shared conversation over a family dinner, or during the ride home from a late night practice. Or, it could be done in solitude, in the quiet moments before sleep. Regardless of the time or place, a daily examen can help your child to grow in self-awareness, love, and gratitude.
Xaverian Brothers High School
Xaverian is a Catholic, college-preparatory school for boys in grades 7-12. As an inclusive community, we embrace diverse experiences and perspectives, welcoming students and families from all faiths and backgrounds. Through exceptional academics, athletics, the arts, faith formation, and service opportunities, we help young men discover their unique gifts and talents so they can share them with a world in need.
